Clearing my mind

It’s been a nice, relaxing past 5 days filled with no exercise and lots of food.  FAR too much food, my body is telling me.  But, after my run on Wednesday, I decided to take a break.  I figured out that my new marathon training program was starting a week earlier than I thought – so today – which means a big increase in my running mileage, plus I am still dedicated to increasing the time I spend on the bike and really, really do want to work on my swim and figure it out… so, instead of focusing just on the marathon program, I will be doing a lot more.

I just keep thinking that by the end of this summer, I really will be in the best shape of my life. That is such a cool feeling!

Pretty easy run this morning for Day 1, except it was pouring rain and chilly.  It did feel GREAT to get outside and move, though, after taking that break.  My body craved it.  ABSOLUTELY craved it.  I get judged a lot – even by those that love me – about my dedication to exercising and healthy living. People don’t understand why I get up early, even on the weekends, to fit in a run, a ride, or a trip to the gym.  They don’t get why I may turn down an extra beer and grab yet another huge bottle of water, but then gorge myself on food.  And why I always pack my running shoes. Always.  And will turn in early (or accidently fall asleep!) so I can get up an hour early to get a quick run in before my kids get up.

I’m not crazy.  Nor do I have a disjointed body image.  I just like how working out makes me feel.  I’m so  much better for it – and trust me, my family appreciates it too.  I think they were ready to force me out of the house to go lift or run or do SOMETHING after this weekend because I was pissy. 

I was thinking about this today during my run… and then came in to find my good friend, Ericka, had posted about it on her blog.  Great minds!

My Ellen keeps on amazing me.  On the way to her swimming practice the other day, I asked her what she thinks about when she is doing laps.  And, at 9.5, she gave me a very profound answer I didn’t expect.  I truly thought she would say something like, “oh, whatever… homework, how many laps I have left, what my sister did to me, etc.”  But she came out with an athlete’s answer and it took my breath away.  I love so much about this kid…  Ellen swims not to be the best, because I’m not sure if she has that exact drive for swimming. But she doesn’t want to be bad.  There is a HUGE difference, and if you have been a competitive athlete before, you know that difference.  Ellen hates to be bad at anything.  But to watch her and to talk to her and to just be around her and swimming, it is hard to miss she has a passion for the sport.  And I love that she does.

She told me that before she starts doing a drill, any laps, she clears her mind and thinks about the stroke she is about to do.  She thinks about what she needs to work on, any adjustments she has to make, and then as she is swimming, she repeats it to herself, over and over.  She doesn’t allow anything else in her mind except those thoughts.  She concentrates on the stroke and only the stroke. 

She told me, and she had never said it before to me, that Summer swim is so much harder for her than her normal year because during Summer recreation league, parents/fans are right by the side of the pools, screaming.  She can hear and see us and no matter how hard she tries, she loses her concentration during meets.  It’s one thing to hear her coaches during her meets year round – she is used to it, she’s supposed to.  But to see and hear us, it breaks her.

I asked her why she has never told us that before.  We are the parents on the sidelines going nuts!  She said because none of us have ever swam before… we wouldn’t get it.  We wouldn’t understand the concentration it takes. But now that I do, I can get it.

So, I’m a swimmer, huh?  I get it.  Now, I have to concentrate.  I, the crazy Type A, have to learn from my Type A daughter.  If she can learn to do it, I should be able to, right?

Have I mentioned how proud of her I am?